SEXUAL ORIENTATION
Sexual orientation refers to the sex, sexes, gender or genders, to which a person is attracted, and which form the focus of a person’s amorous or erotic desires, fantasies, and spontaneous feelings. The alternative terms sexual preference and sexual inclination have similar meanings.
Typically a person may be identified as primarily heterosexual (the focus is primarily people of the opposite sex), homosexual (people of the same sex), bisexual (potentially both or either sexes), or asexual (no sexual desire for either sex).
Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or Heterosexual: Questioning your sexuality
Some young people are attracted to people of the same gender at some stage and this is a perfectly normal part of growing up. If you are attracted to people of the same gender as yourself then you may be lesbian, gay or bisexual. However attraction to people of the same gender may just be a phase and you may decide you are heterosexual. There are different types of sexual orientations and they are all completely normal.
Safer sex
The information about safer sex on this website is just as relevant to you if you are lesbian, gay or bisexual. Barrier methods of contraception such as condoms and dental dams protect against sexually transmitted infections. HIV AIDS is a matter of great concern for any sexually active person including gay men and it is vital to practice safer sex at all times. Safer sex is not just about protecting yourself, it is about respecting yourself and your partner. If you are using any kind of sex toys you need to use condoms to protect from infections being passed from person to person.
Talking about your sexuality
You do not have to tell anyone about your sexual orientation. However, if you are confused or distressed then it may help to talk to somebody you can trust. Equally, if you feel confident that you are lesbian, gay or bisexual then you may want other people to know that this is part of your identity. Telling people you are lesbian, gay or bisexual is often called “coming out”.
Professionals working with young people work within strict confidentiality guidelines.
Telling your parents or friends may be difficult, or it may be absolutely fine. There is no right or wrong way to do this, and there is no “typical reaction” from families and friends. It may be a complete shock to the people you tell, or you may find that they had been expecting you to say something. Most family members and friends will just want you to be happy and any concerns they express are likely to be as a result of this.
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Gender identity: this is how people see themselves in terms of ‘masculinity’ or femininity’. These ideas are mostly shaped by the culture we live in. Gender identity is not the same thing as sexuality.
Transgender: anyone who does not fit into the traditional male –female gender patterns of society.
Cross-dresser: someone who wears the clothes as the opposite sex. It is done for number of different reasons, and you should never assume that a cross-dresser is gay, bisexual or lesbian – many are heterosexual. Cross-dressers often have no desire to change their physical sex.
Transvestism: a form of cross-dressing, with the desire to adopt the clothes, appearance and behaviour associated with the opposite sex.
